Broken

I had forgotten how good it feels to be broken. Truly broken, as if you have to be careful not to drop pieces of yourself as you talk with people, or work, or even sleep...if sleep is possible. I'm not a masochist- I just know this won't last forever, and I can't wait to meet who God fixes me up to be. I was on a trip this weekend to Chicago with a friend and had some of the most delicious conversations. (And anyone who knows me knows that I can survive on delicious artichokes, Fresca, and conversations alone...) Suffice it to say, a lot of things were solidified in my mind, and a similar number of things were blown through with holes...often simultaneously.

I am going to make it a point to revol in this feeling- as if anything will set me crying, or laughing, or wanting to drop everyhing and change my life completely. It's a remarkably unstable place to be and for those who know me and my Highlighters of Many Colors, it's difficult to face. But how tangible tears are, and how real is a good laugh! And if I do decide to change my life completely, so be it. I'm sure everyone who has, at one time or another, not wanted to get out of bed but has been unable to sleep for anticipation will understand.